The Blind, The Deaf, and A Determined Alpha Male…
I bet you can’t guess where this is going. *thinks for exactly a half of a second and then deadpans at you* NOT! You guys know for sure this is going to be a classic Honey story!
That’s why I love you. *Rubs hands together* Okay, where to start?
Last night Honey made dinner because of the deal we carved out long ago. It goes something like this. If I call the in-laws and speak to them at length, he does the cooking and taking care of Madge (my mom). A fair trade, right? I mean while I have an interesting discussion with my MIL, he’s putting together our hunk of meat with two sides of carbohydrates. Yeah, he’s never gotten the corn and baked potato combo right, and quite frankly, I’m getting too old to fight about such things. There are only so many times you can say, “Put some frigging greens on the plate!” Before you silently say to yourself “Screw the salad. I’ll skip the taters.”
Hey, do you guys want to see how the in-law game works in our house? It goes like this:
Kidding. We love our jack- *cough, cough* in-laws!
But to get back to Honey and Madge. After I finish with my conversation with his family, I head into the kitchen which is connected to our family room. And what do I find besides the double carbs cooking and the BBQ outside the window smoking away? Honey and Madge discussing the movie he’s put on for my mom.
I love Madge, but it would be remiss of me not to tell you that in her earlier years (those I will categorize as every day before she turned eighty-five) she was a piece of work. If you’ve been reading this blog for a while you might remember some of the Madge capers. If not, let me assure you. The woman could have put the CIA, FBI, and sneaky little spying aliens in yonder deep-space a run for their flying saucers. Now, however, she’s lost a little steam in the comprehension department. It doesn’t slow her down, which is frightening for me, but it is sad when she’s watching a movie or something because we get a clear picture into the world she now lives in. It’s a place that makes it hard for her to connect certain dots.
But not to worry. Honey is always there to the rescue. Nice and scary at the same time. Check this out. He put on a romantic comedy for her to watch and when she didn’t get the simple boy-meets-girl plot with added conflict for a grand resolve, I hear Honey explaining when the characters wind up in a heated embrace behind some drying bed sheets hanging in a yard.
“Yeah, it’s okay, because they were married before. They didn’t have any kids and it had been a while since they met up again.”
As I’d seen the movie before, there is me thinking, That’s not right.
And Madge nodding. “Good. I was wondering why the two of them were so frisky for each other.”
Then Honey starts to dig in deeper with his explanation of things and even I’m enthralled. By the time he was done speaking about all kinds of events that purportedly happened to this couple – a robbery that had happened at some point bringing this couple together, the kidnapping of one of their dogs, being abducted by aliens, the car chase, and the natural disaster they had lived through only to be separated in the end by their differing dreams, my jaw was resting on the floor. For a second I thought he was gas-lighting my mom when I wasn’t around, and maybe she wasn’t legitimately losing her marbles. But then I noticed something. My mom was paying attention to the movie now with more focus and enthusiasm. That’s when it hit me. Honey had rewritten the script to get her invested.
Oh sure, he’d borrowed themes from Natural Born Killers, Independence Day, Bengi, Gone In Sixty Seconds, and Dante’s Peak, but did that matter if the end result was Mom being engaged in this couple’s journey? I didn’t think so until I heard her ask.
“Where’s the dragon?”
Aaaaand, that’s when I did a double-take. Dragons? Seriously? *Looks right at you* They were watching The Wedding Planner!
Honey didn’t miss a beat. “You see? You’re not the only one around here who’s forgetful. The dragons aren’t in this movie. I just realized that those guys are going to show up in the sequel.”
Listening to my mom tell Honey that it was okay. That she knew how tough it was to forget, my heart smiled, you know? But then he started to tell her about this sequel that never was and I realized the man was nuts. Somehow his dragons had morphed into the Land Before Time, but if my mom noticed he was mixing up the dinosaur/dragon thing she never said a word. She just made him promise that when it came out, he’d buy it for her.
Aw…I waited a minute or two and then I went to give him a hug. While I did, I closed my eyes and whispered to him, “I love your version of movies for Mom.”
And he whispered back, “Great because I have a really dirty version of Last Tango in Paris I’m going to share with you, later on tonight.”
Bah! Me thinks the man was put on this earth to drive me crazy! Meh, I’m not going to complain. Why? This is what I love best about him.
Which got me to thinking…If you guys get nothing else from my blog posts and stories, I hope you get this one thing. We are all connected in amazing ways to the people around us, that has nothing to do with business, politics, race, or gender, but there is one thing we all have in common that we can’t escape. A worldview. I’m privileged enough to share mine with you through my stories and blog posts, so I hope you know it goes something like this.
Time is precious because it’s finite.
Love is consuming because it touches the soul.
But, yeah, if I was going to give you the Reader’s Digest version of such Homely-Philosopher-deep ponderings 😀 I’d liken people to crayons. Oh, don’t look at me like that. Work with me here. People are like crayons because they each have their own shade to color their world with. My favorite color is blue. Why? It’s the canvas of the sky that’s filled with limitless possibilities.
I asked Honey what his favorite color was and he said green. When I asked him why he told me it reminded him of the forest.
You see? Our worldviews are different. While I tended to take our children out to the backyard on a Sunday morning to stretch out on lawn chairs and play “catch a cloud and tell me what shape it is”, Honey would choose to take the kids on a long nature walk through the forests he loves.
The takeaway here? If we both shared the same worldview our children would never know these two vastly different ways of exploring the world around them. Different is good. That’s what makes people unique. If we all had the same thoughts and motivations driving our similar ideas, the concept of being “limitless” would cease to exist.
Just my .02.
*Leans in to whisper to you* Doesn’t mean I don’t think playing a game of catching clouds blows examining twigs and rocks in a forest, out of the water. 😉 It just means, I would never denigrate or prejudge my children for voicing their joy to me over one way, or the other. Why? Simple. Mutual respect. This is their journey in life, not mine.
Oh, and, I don’t just play catch the clouds. I also play find the face, man, or structure in items around my house. Here are a few examples. True story!
*sigh* I miss my ice dick maker machine. I never should have replaced it. No fun! 🙁
Then remember this guy?
I miss him too! Doo-Doo devil guy. Did I mention my father-in-law spent a whole afternoon erasing him when my MIL and I went shopping? 🙁
And now this.
Can you see the face made of out of the wrinkle in the fabric? Yep, yes, that would be me. There I am walking along and I see the face today, and I run to get the camera. Haha! If it ain’t clouds…
So, *props chin in palm and bats eyelashes at you* what color in the crayon box makes you happy?
As always thanks for stopping by!
Oh, and Permit Me is in the final stages before release, so I think we should start our build-a-giveaway soon. Can’t wait!